Why do I Feel Stuck in my Head?

12/29/2024

Why do I Feel Stuck in my Head?

by Cindy Zabinski, LMHC, LCMHC, CRC, ACS

Do you ever get that feeling like you can't get out of your head? You may notice that you struggle with connecting with your current environment, missing out on moments with friends and family. You may notice that you struggle with focusing on a task and completing it. You may notice that you feel like you "shut down" during normal daily activities. These are all different versions of getting stuck in you head. In this blog post, I hope to describe things that might attribute to this struggle and provide some tips for how to get unstuck.

Stress & Anxiety

Two of the main contributors to getting stuck in your head are stress and anxiety. Stress tends to increase as the number and intensity of stressors in our lives increase. You may notice yourself thinking of your "to-do" list often, trying to make sure that you don't forget to complete a task. This can keep you hyper-focused on task completion, keeping you from being present in your daily life. I often utilize the metaphor of a web browser to illustrate this phenomenon. When each stressor or task is a different tab open in a web browser, a person can feel like they have upwards of 5, 10, 50, or 100 tabs open at a time. Imagine how overwhelming it would be to see this on your computer screen!
Anxiety can also keep you stuck in your head. Anxiety is often described as excessive worry about the future. Someone who is worried about upcoming events may find themselves thinking about how the event will go and what will happen, often trying to map out every possible scenario so that they can cope ahead with it. Though coping ahead can be a valuable skill, when it takes up all of your headspace it can keep you from being present in your daily life.

Man sitting on computer outside with hand on head. High levels of stress can make you feel stuck in your head. Reach out to schedule an appointment for online therapy in NY today!

Overthinking

Sometimes we can get stuck in our heads when focusing on the past as well. Have you ever had something occur and then found yourself thinking about it repeatedly? You may find yourself rethinking your steps and actions taken in a certain event. This may be accompanied by a lot of self-criticism if you feel that you had made a mistake. It could be for something as simple as making an error in pronouncing a word during a public speaking experience, or calling someone by the wrong name accidentally. It is possible to feel trapped in thoughts about the event, even though there is no way to go back and change it.

Woman sitting with head in hands looking up. Getting stuck in your head can make you feel paralyzed and alone. Reach out to us to schedule an initial appointment for online therapy in NY today to get unstuck!

Past Trauma

Feeling stuck in your head can also be due to past trauma. When we experience something traumatic, it is jarring to our nervous system. Our brain is likely to struggle with being able to logically understand it. It is difficult to "digest" memories of a traumatic experience for this reason, leaving a person stuck trying to put together the pieces to better process it.
Flashbacks, or experiences where someone feels that they are reliving a traumatic event, are an example of being stuck in your head. It can be difficult to bring yourself out of your head during a flashback due to the emotional response that often surges with it.

How Can I Get Out of my Head?

Now that you hopefully have some reflection on what might be causing you to feel stuck in your head, let's discuss some tools and resources that might help you to get yourself out of your head!

Organize your Thoughs

When you are stuck in your head due to stress and anxiety, organization might be helpful. Using a planner or calendar (virtual or paper) can help you to keep track of upcoming events and due dates for tasks. Write down a grocery list or type it into a note in your phone so that you aren't trying to remember everything you need to buy. Write down recipes and keep them all in one place to refer back to. There are many apps that exist that are focused on organization as well, which can assist you with this goal.

Desk with coffee, weekly planner, glasses and phone neatly resting. Getting organized can help you to get out of your head. Call us to schedule an appointment for online therapy in NY today to help you get unstuck!

Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness involves placing your focus on the present moment and noticing everything about it using your senses without judgment. This helps to bring you out of your head by focusing on the world around you. First, try mindfully observing something. For example, when you go for a walk, notice the sounds around you, the things you see, the feeling of your feet touching the ground, and the smells. Then try to mindfully participate in your activities. An example of this would be to let loose and dance around your house as you listen to your favorite music.
Starting to implement mindfulness into your life can be frustrating, as you might notice your mind wander back into you head at times. People often criticize themselves if this happens, feeling as if they are failing. Keep in mind that each time you notice your mind wandering and return to a state of mindfulness, it strengthens the new healthier pathways you are building in your brain!

Reprocess Your Trauma (Safely)

If you are stuck in your head due to a past traumatic experience, it may be necessary to reprocess that trauma memory in order to get unstuck and out of your head. Though this might seem like a scary process, there are ways to do so safely especially with the help of a mental health professional. Some mental health therapists have specialized training in helping clients to heal from past trauma and there are specific therapy modalities that were created to help with this process (EMDR, TF-CBT, CPT).

Practice Acceptance

Acceptance can help you to get out of your head by letting go of the things that we often overthink. If you find yourself ruminating over a past mistake that you made, having acceptance of it being something that happened in the past and that it cannot be changed can stop the repetitive thoughts. Try using some of these phrases:

"I can't change it, so I might as well accept it!"
"I might not like it, but I can accept it!"
"I am choosing to accept ________."

Engage your Body

A great way to get out of your head is to get into your body! By moving our body, it can help us to bring our focus to other things, such as the exercise we are doing, the feeling of a stretch of a muscle, or our breath. Quick and easy ways to engage your body can include doing a few jumping jacks, doing some simple yoga poses, or going for a quick walk/run. You may have to try a few to find the movement that works best for you.

I hope that this post is helpful to give some possible causes for feeling stuck in your head, as well as to give you some helpful ideas on how you can work towards getting unstuck. Although it can be a process, it is worth it to get out of your head and start connecting with and enjoying life!

Woman dancing in living room smiling. Get out of your head by getting into your body. Call us to schedule an initial appointment for online therapy in NY today to help you get unstuck and mindfully enjoy life!

About the Author

Cindy Zabinski, LMHC, LCMHC, CRC, ACS is the owner of Healing & Growth Counseling. She has worked with many clients over the years that have felt stuck in their heads for one reason or another. Cindy enjoys teaching clients grounding skills that can help them to get out of their heads and connect with the world around them. She has seen so many clients be able to connect and enjoy life by decreasing anxiety, healing from past traumas, and letting go of the past. Cindy finds it helpful to use a planner to organize her schedule and to-do list. She also enjoys grounding herself by mindfully participating in activities like going for a walk or doing yoga.

Interested in learning more about Cindy? Read her bio here.

Interested in scheduling an appointment to help you get out of your head? Call us at (516) 406-8991 or fill out our Contact Form here.

What is the Meaning of Healthy Communication?

12/16/2024

What is the Meaning of Healthy Communication?

by Heather DeGuire, MHC-LP

Communication is the imparting or exchange of information or news. There are different characteristics of communication. Some are: body language, tone of voice, eye contact, and boundary level. Take a moment and consider this: How do you express your emotions and ideas with others?

Man shouting into megaphone. Learning healthy communication skills can improve your mental health and relationships. Call to schedule an appointment for online therapy in New York today.

Communication shapes our experiences with others based on how we verbalize our
needs and emotions. Depending on how emotions are verbalized or boundaries are set can totally change the path of a conversation. This could result in a disagreement if another person misinterprets the information you are conveying because of the tone and deliverance of communication used. When you are communicating socially with others your tone and deliverance should match your intentions.

Interpersonal v. Intrapersonal Communication

Communication comes in different forms; you have external communication and internal communication. Internal communication is the form of communication used most often throughout the day. This form of communication is called intrapersonal communication; it is the internal dialogue in your mind that you use before you engage in social interaction with others. The intrapersonal communication is the self-talk that guides your interpersonal communication socially. Interpersonal communication is the exchange of information between one or more people. It is done typically by speaking, but can also be done in writing. We often engage in interpersonal communication with many people daily, including family, friends, co-workers, and strangers.

Two people smiling laying and petting dog. Using healthy communication skills can help strengthen relationships. Call to schedule an appointment to learn communication skills today!

How to Use Assertive Communication

Assertive communication skills allow you the ability to assertively express feelings and needs without being critical or judgmental of the other person. Assertive communication skills can help with regulating your emotions during social interactions with others. If the communication used towards others sounds critical or blaming it is more likely that the other person will respond with defensiveness. This results in the message being misinterpreted and the other person becoming argumentative, which is most likely not the response that you are hoping for.

I-Statements

An I-Statement is an assertive communication skill that provides the person with a simple way of speaking about their feelings and emotions without appearing critical or judgmental. First, be sure that your intrapersonal communication is neutral/positive before engaging (this will positively influence your use of communication skills with others). As you are expressing your thoughts and feelings with the other person, be sure to start your statements with the word "I". When we use "You" to start our statements, it can often be mis-interpreted as finger-pointing or blaming. Keeping it in the "I" makes sure that the speaker is the subject of the sentence. The other person is more likely to engage in a constructive conversation when I-Statements are used.

The reason for developing strong assertive communication skills is to help you regulate your emotions while navigating through difficult social interactions that are being influenced by a person’s internal (intrapersonal) communication. This assertive communication skill of I-statements allows you to describe your thoughts and feelings without blaming or being critical of the other person.

Developing assertive communication skills can be challenging. Take some time to reflect on your intrapersonal and interpersonal communication, and take small steps towards incorporating assertive communication skills in your day to day life. You can work towards this goal with a friend or family member, giving each other tips and encouragement along the way!

About the Author

Heather DeGuire, MA, MHC-LP is a clinician at Healing & Growth Counseling. Heather works with adolescents and adults, both individually and as couples, on assertive communication. Heather is a big believer in working on intrapersonal communication with clients, as she sees many client struggle with the way in which they speak to themselves, which then impacts their communication style with others. She regularly teaches assertive communication skills to clients and helps them to incorporate them into their daily lives.

Interested in learning more about Heather? Read her bio here.

Interested in scheduling an appointment with Heather? Call us at (516) 406-8991 or fill out our Contact Form here.

Managing Anxiety During the Holidays

12/3/2024

Managing Anxiety During the Holidays

by Heather DeGuire, MS, MHC-LP

Anxiety symptoms are characterized by a feeling of overwhelming sense of worry and concern. The holidays sometimes trigger or amplify anxiety symptoms, especially for those without financial stability or those receiving pressure to attend social gatherings. The holidays could trigger an increase in frequency and duration of anxiety symptoms because of what the holiday means to the person. Some people are not affected by the holidays because they don’t have a negative experience attached to it, whereas some individuals find it hard to regulate their emotions or decrease their intrusive anxious thoughts triggered from the holidays because of their own traumatic experiences related to the holiday.

What Causes Anxiety During the Holidays?

There are many reasons that could result in someone feeling stressed during the holidays that increases a person’s anxiety symptoms. Some scenarios that affect people during the holidays could be someone who has lost a parent, a child that has passed away, a relative aging and unable to travel alone, or the loss of a friend/companion. The holidays can also be difficult for parents because of their expectations that the holiday should be perfect for their children. It is important to find a way of letting go of "perfect" and enjoying the moment with your family, because memories are not planned, they are created in the moment. Anxiety symptoms triggered from the holidays are sometimes intensified by a person’s lack of family, social support, or financial stability.

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How Can I Cope with Holiday Anxiety?

Coping with anxiety is unique to each person and looks different for everyone. Some ways to cope with anxiety symptoms triggered during the holidays could look like engaging in self-care or using cognitive reframing strategies. Read on for some ideas to utilize this holiday season:

How to use Socratic Questioning to decrease holiday anxiety

A form of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) that can help you to cope with anxiety symptoms is Socratic Questioning techniques. This skill helps to challenge the maladaptive thoughts triggered during the holidays and replaces them with rational thoughts. This skill can help you to change the way that you view a difficult situation that emerges during the holidays.
Here's an example: Someone who is really anxious about the holidays might be focused on thinking about there being so much to do and not being able to handle all of it. They can question themselves with "What would happen if everything isn't done perfectly?" to which they might respond with "People would get disappointed." Questionning can continue - "Do people care more about perfection or about having fun spending time together?" This can help this person to recognize that people are more interested in spending time together than everthing being perfect.

How to use self care to decrease holiday anxiety

Some self-care tips to help manage anxiety symptoms during the holidays could be to stay organized and commit to a plan, create your own holiday traditions, make space for feelings of grief when they arise, and keep stress levels at a minimal by delegating or taking space for yourself as needed. Another coping strategy to help manage anxiety symptoms during the holidays could look like journaling what makes you feel anxious. This will help identify and challenge insecurities directly.

Woman sitting and writing in journal wearing glasses. Writing in a journal can help to decrease anxiety and stress. Reach out today to schedule an appointment for online therapy in NY today.

How to use mindfulness to decrease holiday anxiety

Finding mindfulness activities during the holidays will help you stay focused in the present moment and connect with loved ones during the holidays. It is important during this stressful time to learn to treat yourself with love and kindness as you navigate through the difficulties that arise throughout the holidays. A simple mindfulness exercise can be to sit with something that you can enjoy with your senses. For example, a cup of coffee or tea - sit and notice everything about it, including the smell, the warmth of the mug (make sure it isn't too hot!), the sight of the steam coming off of it, and the taste of it as you drink it.
Mindfulness can also be used while attending holiday events. Rather than focusing on everything going as planned, zoom in on the fun that is being had. This may include a game that children are playing, laughter amongst your family, or sitting quietly watching snow fall. There is beauty in so many moments that, should we allow ourselves to focus on it, can help us to feel content and at peace.

About the Author

Heather DeGuire, MHC-LP, is a clinician at Healing & Growth Counseling, providing in person counseling to clients located in the Massapequa Park area, as well as online therapy to clients located across the state of New York. Heather strongly believes in teaching clients coping skills that can be incorporated into their daily lives. As the holidays approach each year, she finds that many of her clients express increased stress and anxiety, which inspired her to write this blog post. Heather finds the skills that she has shared here to be great during the holidays and at all times of year!

Interested in learning more about Heather? Check out her bio here.

Interested in scheduling an appointment with Heather? Call us at (516) 406-8991 or fill out our Contact Form here.